Yesterday I performed my final school event of this academic year to a packed hall at Thomas Alleyne School.
It was the third event of the week and my terrible Scottish accent slipped out at all of them. I might now try to retire the Scottish accent, but it does tend to slip out without me meaning it to. Perhaps there's something in my surname after all, or maybe it's just a latent feeling of solidarity with Andy Murray.
I have a dual pronged plan of attack for dealing with my errant accent. One - I will practise my impression of Stewie from Family Guy. I saw Derren Brown do an excellent Stewie at his show the other day, and he's brought it out on one of the videos on his blog. It cracks me up, so I'm attempting a homage/shameless copy. At future school events I might have to explain that I'm not doing a Stewie, I'm doing Derren Brown's Stewie.
Two - I'm going to Russia. I'm hoping this will entrench a bad Russian accent in place of the bad Scottish accent.
That, at least, will be something different for when my school events kick off again in the Autumn.
That is, if I don't get lost in the Hermitage Museum while I'm in Russia. That place looks HUGE. Anybody who has any tips on how to handle it, please do pass them on.
Finally, here's a little something from the local press: