Tuesday, August 24, 2004

My Car

This will be a strange week. I just took my car into the garage to have some long awaited work done on it. So I'll be using the bus until Friday. I had to ask my girlfriend how to use a bus because I haven't been on one since I left school. Apparently you have to buy your ticket before you get on now. I remember when you just gave the conductor thirty pence. And all this was fields...
My car needs fixing because I drove into a badger at Christmas. No, a badger ran into my car. The whole front bumper was ripped and dented. It looked pretty bad. The badger survived. I swear that badger was three feet long, but my passengers at the time don't think badgers can grow that big.
OK, it was dark and it all happened very quickly, but I'm telling you that badger was one massive beast. How else could it cause 6OO pounds worth of damage to my car? And I don't have special Badger Cover on my insurance. Maybe I should look into protection against wild animals. I just heard that there are Monjack Deer living in Barnet. Apparently they live 'in the shrubs'. In the shrubs? In bushes? Don't deer need fields and forests? How can they be living in suburban hedges?
If anyone can explain this to me I'll be grateful. Also: what's the biggest a badger can be, please.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

I don't know how big a badger can get, but did you know that there is now a sizeable wild boar population in Kent? Now that's one creature you don't want to meet on a dark night. Or even on a not particularly dark night. They can weigh as much as 47 stone and run as fast as a greyhound. They escape from boar farms and farmers don't report it, so no-one knows how many there are in the wild. Didn't think that there was that much wild left in Kent, so maybe they live in shrubs too.

Joe said...

That's amazing! An animal that weighs 47 stone but runs as fast as a greyhound! I'm staggered. Now I know to avoid driving in Kent.

Anonymous said...

What the hell do you people have running around your country???

All we have are deer and beaver.

You need bigger cars like we have in the USA.
Get a Hummer

Anonymous said...

What the hell do you people have running around your country???

All we have are deer and beaver.

You need bigger cars like we have in the USA.
Get a Hummer