I don't know how you found my blog. Were you searching for 'bald baby monkey'? Somebody was. And somebody else found this blog by searching for 'typed monkey'.
I don't even know what a typed monkey is. An old-fashioned version of a word processor monkey?
And if that were that, then, as they say, that would be that. But it's not.
Because more than one person - in fact SEVERAL PEOPLE - found this blog by searching for 'monkey wearing glasses'.
I can't help feeling I've let my readers down. I so rarely talk about monkeys wearing glasses.
But the disappointment doesn't end there. Because now we turn to some of the most popular search terms that bring people to my blog. These aren't just freakish mistakes, remember, these are among the most popular search terms that bring people here.
The top one is 'Jimmy Coates: Blackout' - that makes sense. Loads of people want to know when it's coming out (and there's some exciting news about that coming very soon...), but here are some of the other MOST POPULAR SEARCHES that bring people to... me:
- "building a hotel up on a hill"
- "burlington arcade whistling exception"
- "cartoon pictures of monkeys for kids"
- "hot chinese massage"
- "russian chocolate"
What a picture that paints of the way I live, up on a hill in the fancy hotel I built for myself, whistling where nobody else is allowed to whistle, while a hot Chinese masseur feeds me Russian chocolate and we laugh about our favourite monkey cartoons.
I can't complain. It's a life.