It's that time of year again when I make lots of jokes about how I haven't been nominated, then I stay up all night and end up bleary eyed at 6am wondering why I get excited about the Oscars in the first place.
But not this year.
Sadly, I'll still have to make jokes about how I haven't been nominated, because, well, I haven't been nominated. But I won't be having friends round to watch the ceremony; I won't even be watching it myself.
No. This year I have Sky+, which enables me to record the ceremony at the push of a button, then watch it back at my leisure, with the added bonus of being able to fast forward through all the boring bits. I'll be through the whole thing in half an hour.
And so to my predictions. I've never made them so publicly before. In fact, in previous years I've put money on my predictions, and I usually come out in profit. This year I decided not to, because the odds were not worth the risk. This is because, for once, my predictions tally with the bookmakers. That is not to say I am any more confident of being right, and in some cases I hope that I am wrong. That last bit is easier this year, what with me not having any dosh riding on it.
What and who will win: 'The Aviator' (but it should be 'Million Dollar Baby'); Martin Scorsese (but I hope I'm wrong and it's actually Clint Eastwood); Jamie Foxx (for 'Ray', and quite right too); Hilary Swank (for 'Million Dollar Baby', but it probably ought to be Imelda Staunton for 'Vera Drake').
I'm also pretty keen on the idea of Jamie Foxx winning for 'Collateral' as well, and thus twice in one night. But that's not going to happen. He'll lose to Alan Alda (for 'The Aviator'). Best Supporting Actress? Tricky. Either Cate Blanchett or Laura Linney. I'm not bothered.
There's a full list of nominations at www.oscar.com (along with other Oscar bumph). But you probably knew that already.